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Inspiration, Psychology, Relationships, Society, Women's Issues

Who Do You Trust?

Without trust there is no relationship!

At the risk of sounding like a character from a Jackie Collins novel from time to time in life I’ve felt a little betrayed. Which brings me to ask the aged old question – who do you trust and who can you trust in this life?

It’s not an easy question to answer. I heard recently that Prince William (I’m no royalist but the lad seems to have his head screwed on the right way), often tells new people a little lie. He usually finds that within weeks the ‘lie’ will be decorating some trashy magazine or tabloid paper. It’s a clever tactic for him to discover who he can trust. Sadly, for us mere mortals, often it can take years before we who know we can trust and quite often we may never actually be sure if our new friend has passed on our news to willing ears.

It’s a huge leap of faith to trust people. I’ve made many dreadful mistakes. Harsh lessons have been learned. Please do share with me, tell me your stories?

My biggest mistakes with trust? Trying desperately to protect friends. It is often quite a pointless exercise as said friends rarely truly appreciate the gesture, they very often repeat your concerns. The friends I have tried to protect often say, ‘ah but he has never hurt me!‘ I have found that people don’t generally listen unless they have already been bitten too. Warnings are often ignored. People are often invincible until my truth slaps them too hard on the face.

I think in life it is always best to know who to trust. I’d rather feel the grief of knowing you can’t trust a friend than be in the dark. There is little worse than having friends and monitoring every word you say for fear that they are simply off to repeat your every worry, your every tear over coffee. There is surely nothing much worse than having an insincere friend who mocks your truth and gossips with glee about your deepest feelings?

I would describe it as, and I speak from experience like a pack of wolves tearing your own personal truth to pieces like frenzied beasts in the night. People are often very quick to point the finger at others but are rarely willing to recognise their own mistakes.

It is vital to trust yourself. It is vital to trust your own instincts. Sadly, there will always be people out there who will be quite content in weakening your resolve. They will delight in assassinating your character.

Know who you are. Know your own character. Trust in yourself. Anything else is a bonus. If you find beautiful friendships full of trust, honest and integrity, let’s cherish them. I know I do. It takes many rain clouds to realise when you have found your sun rays. Don’t give your trust so easily, let people earn your trust – learn from my mistakes!

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About Alana Munro

Writer. Mama to three, wife to one. Red wine consumer.

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